Oh What a Lovely Window

So, I live in a nice neighborhood. The people here are kind and sweet. And, I thought I'd spread a little holiday cheer with some messages in my window. But I guess we just weren't all on the same page. These are the ones I had to take down after complaints.

Have One Hell of a Christmas!

May There Be Love With Your Brothers!

ChristmASS for the wHOLE world

I show you my tree... you show me yours

I'll get you!

Jingle Bleed

Bleeping Contact

It has been learned this past week that a US senator from Illinois may have had contact with the governor of Illinois. A stunning accusation that has rocked the entire political world.

Said a woman on the street,"How dare he have contact with the governor of his own state. Once you go to Washington you sever all ties with the state that you originate from. There is no more communication between US senators and governors."

Said the senator, "I am very sorry for this contact with the governor, I brushed up against him while trying to squeeze past a group of people talking at a party. If I could take back this moment, I would, as I now have a large rash on my back from this contact. I was simply trying to get a second piece of cake. Bleep it was good!"

Type! Type! Type! Type! Goooo Typewriters!

You know your NFL or college football career is in trouble when you end up on this team.

Urine for a Surprise: Testing NASA's Urine Machine

When you're floating above the earth, away from conveniences of life, doing high-stress tasks day in and day out, the last thing you want to hear is that the urine machine broke down - the machine that converts condensation and urine, aboard space shuttle Endeavor, into fresh drinking water.



That's my space fridge, and space kitchen aboard a separate craft orbiting just outside the shuttle Endeavor. We dock briefly when they need special problems resolved, like when they need some candy, or a postage stamp, live bait, bobble heads. You know, home sweet home stuff. We don't totally get along, I often get into big fights with the crew because I still believe the world is flat even though I can plainly see the earth outside my own spacecraft's window. But anyway, they asked me to help fix the machine... see, while floating outside the shuttle I found this great bag of tools.

Shopping List Cartoon

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